je_levy: (Want! Want! Want!)
...Just a little wafflery while I keep at it with the rest of the [livejournal.com profile] help_pilipinas fics :3


Rules: List 1-10 pairings/prompts that you have been dying to read. Maybe it's a really rare pairing or something you've requested on any of the past smut memes which haven't been fulfilled. When you see this posted on your friends' journals, you may do one of the following:

- Write it.
- Link to one that's already been written, whether by you or someone else.
- Nothing, but karma will get you. >_>

There are no length or rating limits, and prompts may be duplicated (PLEASE). Be specific in your prompts particularly in reference to preferred smut content, seme/uke order, and any other requirements that may hinder your appreciation of the fic.

There is no deadline for this, but once your ten prompts have been written to your satisfaction you are welcome to make a new post starting over. You may write your own prompts if you want. If your tastes change, you can certainly switch out one prompt for another at any time.


1. Junno/Koki good cop/bad cop (points if they can't decide which of them is the bad cop) with Chief Nakamaru. I'm thinking every single ridiculous buddy cop movie ever done along the lines of hijinks.

2. Doctor Hotta <= Maru and/or Koki (or both) end up at a hospital and are justifiably puzzled at a slightly 'different' Taguchi wandering the halls in a lab coat.

3. NTT/Koyama - lol if they could just get him alone during this busy time.

4. Nakamaru/Ueda - any further exploration on Maru's obvious bondage kink. (Well, I say obvious... <.<)

5. Any K8 member/Koki - all the moé he exudes at any given time gets into someone's head and just won't go away. Sort of a 'haunted by thoughts of Koki' thing.

6. Koyama/Junno - coercion. Every tactic Koyama can come up with to get an obliviously unaware Junno in the sack.

7. Ueda/Koki - Ueda is capable of making Koki do absolutely anything.

8. Nakamaru instigating any form of gunplay with Ueda, Koki, or Junno. 

9. Junno/Nakamaru - Junno is the only person who can get Maru riled up enough for a real fight. Well, if sexual tension can really be that palpable, they should probably just consummate violently /logic (biting, scratching, hair pulling all OK )

10. Junno/Koki - this picture indicates to me that Junno doesn't like having to let Koki go. (whoo~ possessiveness kink)

(My tastes have become so singular, haven't they?)

Other Lists
ayame_hadouken
ryogrande
elizajet
luna_truths
wintersdancer
yue_akuma
alternatejess
kyjr
peroxidepest17
sashjun
swedish_weirdo
tatoeba
tinyangl
je_levy: (Generale M)
Title: Target Acquisition
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: KuroMaru (Nakamaru/Kuroki Meisa)
Warning: Guns (of the survival game variety), het!sex
Summary: Maru wouldn’t just let anyone hold his Spring Magnum. He is, after all, a gentleman.


A/N: Inspired from Meisa's using survival games to vent stress (win y/y?); her surprising shyness, her loving to play in the mountains and her adorable tank-top.

Written for the $1 a drabble fundraiser (what are you talking about? >:O This is a drabble because I say it is!) for one very wonderful [livejournal.com profile] ryogrande who requested Nakamaru het. *__*

Ri, thank you for giving me an excuse (and a charitable one at that) to do this. It was some shameless fun <3<3



"He is definitely NOT an animal." )

je_levy: (INFINITE FRIENDS)
What's a draiser?... huh.

Possibly something General Red Fox condones?


lol enough flamhammery. It is 5:40-something P.M. here in Vancouver. I am like minutes away from having to disappear for NYE merriment and silliness until countdown and mosthap thereafter >.>, but before that happens.



HAPPY 2012


I have wishes for fun, delights, goal success, love, hilarity and fabness to hit each one of you like a chain collision in the front :D You're all pretty damn amazing and that's why I've liked you all best. You were pretty much one of the best fucking things happening to me this year.

In other news, in light of the typhoon, a couple people banded together and arranged [livejournal.com profile] help_pilipinas, I've signed up for it's very clever; very successful $1 for a drabble where I will write any drabble for a quick donation and that includes any and every pairing in KAT-TUN excluding JunDa or Akame (naturally, it is not a question of prejudice but an especial consideration for my own ability to pull either off believably. <3)


mini details )


Finally, I have also signed up for the [livejournal.com profile] help_pilipinas
auction for fic or drabble.

Here in THIS ENTRY you can bid for someone to do a fic or a graphic for you with the details provided within
and such. So if you'relooking for fic you deeply wanted or artwork, there is the place to go where most bids start
at a dollar. 

So having said all that, it is time to discard the bathrobe of 2011 and put on the clothing of the NYE variety
and go ring in the new year.

Love you. See you in 2012!



[credit tanaka_kyoudai]
je_levy: (KAT-TUN)
(≧∇≦)/!!!!!!!!!!!!!


dkfnkdngknkjfnk!!! It's mid-December! Do you understand what that means??



FIC THE FAITH!
KAT-TUN fic exchange

rules and intro
Sign-ups start on December 17



In this instance, do not stand in awe as it occurs but hop aboard; this is your chance to request and read the KAT-TUN fic you've always wanted and to write and make someone else's dreams come true! :'D

As it says on the label, signups start tomorrow! Come and join the Sweet Chain of fics, gather up your Yuuki no Hana and ride the virgin stars (:s) over to [livejournal.com profile] fic_the_faith and witness the BIRTH of the fics that Run For You...r favourite pairings and genre styles.
je_levy: (Want! Want! Want!)
And so on our final consecutive day (but certainly not the last ever) of Koki gifspam, we need to make this special, so not only are the drinks so much more expensive (free for bunny folk only), but the gifs are so much harder to resist. Also, it's later in the evening :D what do you mean I got lazy and posted late? no, this was entirely my intention from day one

Photobucket

Nice save :D!

So while the getting's still good, raise your glasses once more for someone so alarmingly cute, we're still trying to work out how best to deal with it all ;A;


Whorish to the very End :'D )
je_levy: (Bad-Ass)
Yes, yes ok, his birthday was a week ago. I had other valid reasons for doing this though. Perfectly valid reasons with the word

being one of them...


Warning: There really is a whole ass-load of gifs past this entry and several entries to come (100+ means close to 200 or maybe even more than that). Yeah, it's upsetting enough as it is but worse still, the gifs aren't even apologetic about it. They're gonna sit here in their shameless perpetuated motion and MUW (make u wait) as they mutually load themselves (srsly so slutty). So please, please give these gifs the benefit of the doubt. They will not let you down when you've waited, though. And they know you want them, so seriously you're not fooling anyone.

Even if you're genuinely disinterested these gifs themselves are determined to win your affection:
Before you jump in to the image-heavy; let's address the drinking game rules.

1 shot for hair-touching
2 for Self-touching (or self-grabbing :s!)
3 for Girlishness (or delightful cross-dressing)
4 for MUWtt  (make you wish to touch)
5 for Nekoki
(rules founded by the esteemed [livejournal.com profile] sekky_chan)
Look, bro, they MOVE )
je_levy: (*incoherence reasons*)
LET'S GIVE MARU SOME FIC



Its still his birthday in my book, so...

Give me ANY Maru pairing and I will write one sentence of TEN genres for them. The genres are:

1. Angst
2. AU
3. Crack
4. Future fic
5. First Time
6. Fluff
7. Humor  Badfic Parody
8. Hurt/Comfort
9. Smut
10. UST (Unresolved Sexual Tension)


Now when I say Maru pairings, I mean any and every Maru pairings. I will write them and I'm especially looking forward to creativity and even the ones we're used to. So even if you want to request something random like Sho/Maru (*cough* [livejournal.com profile] chainsawpants *hack*) or a relevant threesome like NTT (*wheezes* [livejournal.com profile] sekky_chan *dies*) I will write it and happily!!


♥ 10 Genre Sentences So Far ♥

1.    Maruda requested by [livejournal.com profile] luna_truths
2.    Sho/Maru requested by [livejournal.com profile] chainsawpants
3.    NTT requested by [livejournal.com profile] sekky_chan
4.    Nakanishi requested by [livejournal.com profile] ryogrande
5.    Ru/Kazu (Johnny Rocker-verse) requested by [livejournal.com profile] randomicicle
6.    Tom Riddle/Maru requested by [livejournal.com profile] chainsawpants
7.    NakaMa requested by [livejournal.com profile] chuckles0505
8 .   Nakamaru/pudding requested by [livejournal.com profile] elizajet
9.    Tagumaru requested by [livejournal.com profile] encoded_panties
10.  Nakame requested by [livejournal.com profile] bellemelody
11.  NakaNaka requested by [livejournal.com profile] sekky_chan

je_levy: (YUMMY!)
Title: LESBIANS, KAME!
Pairings/ Characters: Nakamaru Yuichi/ Ueda Tatsuya, KAT-TUN and their flamhammery.
Rating: NC-17
Warning: Sex!.. and talk of it, established relationship, romance, silliness, genre-overshadowing, and lesbians of course.
Summary: Two years and some months is a long time to be with anyone, but it doesn’t matter when you’re still going strong. Strong and so very, very without sex. And Yuichi is more attractive with each day passing.”Not cool,” Ueda thinks.
Notes: 7,550 words. Originally written for [livejournal.com profile] sashjun during this year's [livejournal.com profile] fic_the_faith originally posted here. I had so so so much fun writing this, so I hope the rest of you have fun with it too. 

If you have read this and you're still all wriggly for moar Maruda, I want to recommend this adorable fic. It made my night last night as you'll probably spot from the incoherent flail one comment in.

"Lesbians are really cool, aren't they?" )
je_levy: (Guchi Brand)

Title: Polish Your Cut, but Melt You In Fire
Rating: NC-17
Paring: Junno/Maru, heavily implied Junno/Jin
Warnings Some possibly disturbing imagery, sex, violence, and character death
Summary: "Nakamaru Yuichi looked nothing at all like what Junno pictured those nights when he woke from his odd, pale and sour dreams. He’d expected someone thick, layered and hurt the way Jin was. Someone new and unjaded because Junno really wanted to trigger something hot, taste something burning. "

A/N: Originally remixed from [livejournal.com profile] virdant 's Hitman!AU for [livejournal.com profile] jentfic_remix 's 6th Cycle.

Reel aside, this was my biggest challenge these past months and it took me days and a great deal of inner angst issues to suss out before I could finish. Not necessarily because it was a darkfic but because I was working with an open ending which I could've taken anywhere I wanted, but the psychology of having something as undeniably serious as getting involved with a murderer occur along with the nonchalant and cheery way said murderer behaves about his job is what caught me.

I also wanted to do this while avoiding any pretention or overt melodrama. In the end, I'm pleased with the result. I hope you enjoy!


For Junno, it was like... )
je_levy: (Desire)


Suga Shikao


Wait, this is KAT-TUN-related I promise. I am one of those unfortunate enough to only have known about this man during my days watching xxxHolic. Of course, some of you may have already heard of him long before that since he is an incredibly talented Singer-Song-writer, directs his own PVs, composes songs for other people that of which includes KAT-TUN's REAL FACE.

But this is not news for you. What may be news is a beautiful performance between Kame and this man, lit by candles, ambiance punctuated by invested and soulful eye contact. 

 Ai Ni Tsuite by Suga Shikao and Kame in case you haven't seen it yet..

Their voices blended really well and they have some surprising chemistry, but I guess we can all mostly agree that Kame has chemistry with a lot of people. Well, Kame has chemistry with his bathroom mirror, such is his sex appeal. So I just utterly loved this performance honestly and couldn't get it or the interview out of my head. Not forgetting Suga-san's anecdote about confusing Kame with a Takarazuka stage actress either. So I got to talking with [livejournal.com profile] ryogrande and in remembering my favourite songs by Suga Shikao, the first PV by him I ever watched came to mind in which he plays at the concepts of photography, still-life, and moving objects blending with sexuality, attraction and obsession.

19sai   (warning: not safe for work) by Suga Shikao for reference if you don't quite get what I mean.

So having said that, she and I agreed to sign up for [livejournal.com profile] je_devilorangel together this year, but naturally it's difficult to write a whole fic when writing styles tend to clash, so we decided to give it some practice, and operating on the note of conversation we were on, we decided why not play on Kame's innate chemistry, why not Suga Shikao and the concept in his PV? 
Right, so this is its sexy result. Co-written and co-beta'd by [livejournal.com profile] ryogrande and myself (^^). Enjoy!

Note: The key detail we're looking to explore here is whether or not you can tell who wrote which paragraph and whether the transitions are smooth. :D


Title: 19mm Kamera
Co-Authored by[livejournal.com profile] je_levy  and [livejournal.com profile] ryogrande 
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Kame/Kame, Kame/Camera, Kame/Suga Shikao
Warning: Potential delusion, facial, dark themes, and a pearl necklace
Summary: "Suga-san, the voyeur with the sixth sense of a photographer, knew what Kame’s camera wanted and Kame had trusted him to submit."

(Read More) <== re-directs to Ri's website.
je_levy: (Default)
 Warning: The operative word for these entries is crack, so I don't expect anyone to take this at complete and utter face-value, not even the drug-usage,  except that majority of what I say here, I tend to have some backing for. How's that for cryptic? You know, pics or it didn't happen?


The Extremely Excellent
and Mostly Crack Post of
the Sexy Maru Epic: War and Drama



Link to Chapters One and Two

Chapter 3: The General Has His Script and Is Generally OK with an Interview.
Ah, just so you know...
...so listen up! :B


WHERE DOES HE BITE?!! )
je_levy: (Jin)
Title: Butterfly Inferno
Rating: NC-17
Pairings: Akame, Nakanishi, Kameda, Kokame, but just so you know, even if the pairing is listed, it does not guarantee that it is a happy one.
Warnings: You’re not gonna get this much drama anywhere else, I am unashamed to admit. Also we’re going AU where Jin is still in KAT-TUN presently, there was neither a solo concert nor an Asian Tour. Also in this universe, existing entirely in my mind, the big jimusho is out for quality, not quantity thus the wicked and incomprehensible plot turn.
Disclaimer: I wonder how much anyone would pay for this trivially angst-soaked fun? Well, I wouldn’t know, would I?
Summary: In desperation, each member of KAT-TUN silently makes his effort to repair the problem they're all afraid to talk about, but too often desire will ride higher than necessity."He stopped trying by the end of 2008, puttering out into an awful quiet, the idol in him black, frayed and damaged."




Chapter 5 Cont'd )
je_levy: (D:)
I rarely if ever do two posts in a day because I usually don't even have the time, but seriously I had to show my displeasure.

I wanted to tell a friend of mine about Ueda and directed her upon the only somewhat dependable KAT-TUN page on wiki and received horror to my eyes:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/KAT-TUN#Band_members

Yes, there's plenty of info available in English for the K and A of KAT-TUN, but the other woogies previously "summary existence" paragraphs are erased.

Unless involved user is currently constructing personal pages for each of these guys, I gotta say ゆるせない!!!

I mean it's bad enough that the other members get treated like backdancers to a lot of the general public and people frequently rape poor Maru's name and switch the a's and u's, but some egotistical fan has gone and said, meh, no one wants to know about them.
je_levy: (QT)
Ok, so mostly of late I've been working on Butterfly Inferno whilst trying to recover from my own form of KAT-TUN related angst over many different things.

So I decided I'd dust off my Best of KAT-TUN album and have a nice listen-through for some of my favourites. To be honest, I've always been a music fan, and I'd had to listen to Gold a number of times before I actually started liking these smexy six. Before I bothered searching clips for Shounen Club and scouring the internet for Gokusen, I was a big fan of their music.

My favourites when Oricon was still raving about this album four years ago was Real Face naturally, then Wilds of my Heart, then Rhodesia, then finally all the solos with One on One as my ichiban with Butterfly in close second.

I promise there's a question! )
je_levy: (Woot!)
Despite yesterdays bad news, we can still move on and hope for the best, ne?

So how about this week's Cartoon KAT-TUN~

We get a fun and slightly heated Kameda rivalry (they always are in my head), Koki only being mildly interested in the josei-form and Ueda's kawaii egao resembling someone's loved one.

GET ALL THAT AND MORE RIGHT HERE~
je_levy: (Desire)

I’ll apologise ahead of time if I don’t get to your comment from last entry. I enjoy trading messages with anyone willing to message, but being stretched for time (The conditions of having Yamato Nadeshiko Shichi Henge subbed and released the same weekend it’s released requires less socializing)




Cartoon KAT-TUN Episode 134 Translations Part 2




 

Chin-shite chips )

je_levy: (OMNOMNOM)

Well with this jounral currently being active with fanfic, I figured it wouldn't hurt for me to use it for other fandom ventures, if you'll allow me such an indulgence.

Toyuakede, hallo! Most of you may already recognise me as the youtuber formerly known as GRABBAGWOOT. I used to post Cartoon KAT-TUN episodes weekly with translations in the side-bar. Now that youtube is consciously following my account activities I can’t upload another video with so much as a KAT-TUN clip in it without them immediately taking action. Still I enjoyed doing the summaries and translations because it was giving me ample practice and I was learning from the kind people willing to correct and instruct me.

Okie, since this is my first translation post at this journal I figured it would be sensible to write a little disclaimer:

What I know of Japanese is the kanji and kana that I’ve learned from the little schooling that I’ve had. The rest is all that I’ve acquired from many years listening to and speaking the language to fellow learners and/or speakers. This means that I’m not guaranteeing 100% accuracy. This is editable, so if and when you find mistakes feel free to say so and I will add it in. I figure that this would be an excellent first step toward getting these episodes subbed and it would be a fandom-wide effort. Now, that sounds nice, I think…

I decided to take up with this episode since this was the most recent one that I’d uploaded and still remains unsubbed. The actual RAW (if you don’t already have it) can be found here.

Enjoy~

 

Comedy Okite~! )

 

 

je_levy: (Woot!)
Title: Butterfly Inferno
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Akame, Nakanishi, Kokame, and so many many other KAT-TUN combinations.
Warnings: This is intense; I mean, angst like you rarely(?) see in a JE fic.
Disclaimer: If I owned them, and this fic was true, then you'd have read it sooner I'm sure. lol. No seriously, KAT-TUN isn't mine and nor am I going to get money for being a serious perv
Summary: In desperation, each member of KAT-TUN silently makes his effort to repair the problem they're all afraid to talk about, but too often desire rides higher than necessity. 'Pain like this is something you can't erase, so we have to do what we can to make it all hurt a little less...because of who they are to us.'

Notes: I'm sure you know this, but I figure it's worth mentioning. Emojii means emoticons/smilies.    

 

Chapter Two )
je_levy: (ugh...arms)

Title: Butterfly Inferno
Rating: PG-13 (future R rating)
Pairing/Group: KAT-TUN member ai, Akame, Nakanishi, Kokame and several, several others
Summary: In desperation each member of KAT-TUN silently makes his effort to repair the problem they’re all afraid to talk about, but too often desire rides higher than necessity. It’s only when it’s most painful that they begin to realise how much they need one another and how foolish they were not to see it sooner.



Chapter One Cont'd ) 

                    When Maru pushes the dressing room door open, Ueda and Kame are mid-laughter with eyes fixed on, for some reason, Taguchi who has Koki by the front of the shirt. Koki has his theatrics switched on with his eyes widened and his lips trembling. There’s only the minor, usual break in conversation that comes when Akanishi wordlessly brushes past Nakamaru to flop carelessly on the sofa opposite Ueda. Kame, straddling a chair backwards, has become an expert at pretending nothing just happened. Instead he fixes a bright-eyed grin on Nakamaru.

            “Come watch what those two are rehearsing to do before the VTR screening today,” he says, getting up to walk over. “Taguchi’s supposed to make him mad, then Koki gets attacked instead.” Kame’s thin fingers wrap warmly around his arm, and Maru is forcibly reminded of how many times, five years ago, he’d sat and listened to Kame half-sob that no one talked to him anymore, that all the Johnny’s juniors their age hated him or talked behind his back. Nakamaru also couldn’t help thinking about the day two years ago he’d found Kame in a bathroom of some bar in Ginza, practically vomiting his stomach up, hiccoughing out warm words that could only have been Jin’s. Kame kept telling Maru everything with that constant refrain, “…because I trust you.”

However much the guilt strikes him, Nakamaru had come to the understanding that Kame was just the type of person you had to hide things from. He was tender in the way that he thought he was strong, and anyone who knew Kame well could see immediately when something small had needled its way inside him. The way he’d stop eating, just completely stop like he’d forgotten that he needed to. He’d invite his juniors out to dinner, his treat, but all he’d order for himself were the daiquiris and shochu in tall glasses. Then as all his guests and admirers chatted amiably around him, he’d slowly and systematically get himself drunk.

           

            The audience’s screams are as deafening as ever as they each step upstage. Nakamaru always takes extra care to brace himself before coming out here. It’s something he’s never really been able to pinpoint, but it occurs to him often that even when he’s at the age of forty, he’ll still get stagefright. Before long, Kame begins the intro, and he can settle back into ad-lib, rehearsed insults, and timed laughter.

            Akanishi bumps shoulders with him just as the applause is dying down. Nakamaru decides not to react; he isn’t too sure just yet how effectively he can communicate with Jin on camera especially when there are still some vestiges of the other man’s taste just on the inside of his bottom lip.

            “Summer is ending, isn’t it? Any new things you’ve noticed for the coming autumn?” Kame prompts, swivelling to glance quicky at Taguchi.

            “Hai!” The tallest member raises his hand swiftly. “I’ve noticed something.”

            “Hai, Taguchi, douzo.”

            Taguchi, grin wide as ever, folds his hands in front of him and looks over at Koki. “Koki, your clothing choice recently has become cute.”

             Koki’s timing is deliberately perfect as his head whips in Taguchi’s direction, withering look in place. “Hah?” he says and Nakamaru has to bite his lip to keep from smiling. It may be rehearsed, but Maru has always been weak against Koki’s brand of humour.

            “Your clothing choice…you were going for the cute pattern. It suits you na!” Maru can never tell if it’s intentional, but Taguchi’s wearing his most annoying expression.

            Koki’s once decisively enraged expression goes blank. “Arigatou,” he mutters humbly.

            Without thinking, Nakamaru bursts out. “Eh?? You won’t get angry?” Koki never did like following the show’s script even when he himself wrote it.

            They audience erupts laughing right along with Taguchi as Kame offers a smack across the back of Koki’s head. Ueda meets Maru’s eye as he shakes with chuckles, and he can feel Akanishi tug lightly on the back of his coat. These are one of their finer moments on television, and it reminds Nakamaru all too clearly why they’re all still doing this. Painful as it has become, it is these moments that are like a salve.

 

            That night, Nakamaru goes out to eat with Ueda, but such a thing has become routine for the both of them. After all, Maru likes to end his day this way, no stress or unnecessary banter; just the distant and unobtrusive aura the other man emits when he’s eating. It is more than calming, it’s healing. When Nakamaru first met Ueda, he was under the immediate impression that he’d never quite figure him out, but within that same year it seemed Ueda’s mannerisms had become engraved in his mind. Maru would never quite know what Ueda Tatsuya was about to do next, but once he’d done it, Nakamaru found he know exactly why it had been done. Such a predictable unpredictability set Maru at ease.

 It was also easy to think around Ueda since the boy was always doing that himself, sometimes breaking off his run-on, off-topic statements with a sudden frown or an abrupt laugh.

Ueda keeps his hands on his lap as he leans over his menu until his face is mere inches from the page. He’s a twenty-six year old going on twenty-seven and still stubborn enough that he won’t wear his glasses when he needs them. “Lately I’ve realised that I don’t much like mushrooms,” he murmurs.

            Nakamaru finds this, among many other titbits of information that Ueda flings out now and then, lacking in substance. He doesn’t comment as he looks over his own menu; he feels perfectly at ease doing so until he realises that he’s being looked at. Ueda’s eyes are hard as always, and that has always been significant to Maru; the way the guy is deceptively beautiful, but startlingly strong mirrored by a strictly male mindset.

            “I was beginning a conversation,” Ueda states sternly.

            “Gomen, what was it again?”

            “What I said before isn’t necessary now since we’re already talking. I actually have something to tell you. Please listen.”

             Maru is humouring this behaviour since he’s not sure if Ueda’s joking or if he really is that neurotic. He nods.

            “First…you and I both know something, and we haven’t been talking about it; something none of us has talked about since it began.”

            It is only now that a burgeoning panic rises in Maru’s middle. He folds his menu a little fretfully, thinking quickly of ways to put this conversation off. It could mean addressing so many things, all of his thoughts, feelings, and worst of all his fears. He can feel Jin’s presence in the middle of it all, like an ugly centrepiece in the middle of a room. The taste he savours in his mouth.

            “Before I didn’t care either way…Ka-they could do whatever they like because it’s their private life, and it never got in the way of anything. But let’s be honest, the breakup will always be the thing that made KAT-TUN what we are today. We’re all…I mean, you, me, Koki, and Taguchi; we’re all getting better at this, all doing our best, but lately it’s more difficult…for me.”

            Nakamaru is aware that Ueda is getting ready to start ranting, the other boy’s hands are curled on top of his menu, white swimming under his calloused knuckles. Maru leans back and folds his arms, not quite sure how to reply.

            “We…” He pauses; the words are distant from him. “We need to keep trying. If Akanishi…their situation is complicated; it’s something we don’t understand because we’re not them. Kame isn’t dealing with it properly and he’s not moving on. Ji-Akanishi is quiet because he knows if he starts talking then Kame will fade out, and that’s more frightening than any….than anything.”

            Ueda’s stress threshold is a high one, so it bothers Nakamaru when the other boy rubs the sides of his head quickly, impulsively. “That’s not it…Kame has moved on; at least I thought he had-“

            “If you’re talking about the thing with Kyon-chan…”

            “I’ve been sleeping with him.”

            Nakamaru feels the bottom of his stomach drop away as his mouth goes dry.  The words hang between them like dust and Ueda’s expression crosses from helplessness to sheer relief.

Chapter One Cont'd )

 

 

 
 

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